Shabbat Parashat Toldot - 5783

Shabbat Parashat Toldot - 5783

Rabbi Hal Miller Yitzchak was forty years old when he took Rivka, daughter of Betuel the Aramean from Paddan Aram, sister of Lavan the Aramean, as a wife for himself. [Bereishit 25:20] The Torah tells us Yitzchak's age in our verse, and again in 25:26, "Yitzchak was sixty years old when she bore them." We could calculate these ages based on other things we know. Why do we need to be told here? We know from Avraham's age at Yitzchak's birth and Sarah's age at her death exactly Yitzchak's age at the akeidah, thirty-seven. A Midrash tells us that Rivkah was born upon Sarah's death and Rashi adds that Yitzchak had to wait until she was three before marrying her. He says that Yitzchak had to wait until Rivkah was thirteen and could conceive, which makes him fifty, and that she was barren for ten years, thus he was sixty upon the birth of his sons. But not everyone agrees with Rashi. Chizkuni calculates that Rivkah was fourteen upon the marriage, to which Radak adds that she was barren for twenty years. Again, though, Yitzchak would have been sixty at the time of the births. Rashbam concurs on the twenty years for Rivkah being barren. Rav Schwab attempts to reconcile these opinions. When we say that Rivkah was born at the time of the akeidah, that does not refer to her physical birth, which occurred eleven years earlier, rather the maturing of her neshama as the replacement in the world for Sarah. He says that the three year delay, shown to us by our verse mentioning Yitzchak being forty, is to teach that when we marry, we must spend the time getting to know and assess the neshama of our proposed spouse. Abarbanel takes the flip side of that position. He notes that Chazal teach that one should be ready to marry at eighteen, but Abarbanel argues that this is merely a reference to the physical ability to beget, not to the emotional ability to be in a marriage. Yitzchak delayed to work on himself. By subduing his physical desires he was able to prepare his neshama to carry on the work of his father. Malbim adds that this is the development of the intellect. Why did it take so long for Yitzchak and Rivkah to have children? Rav Soloveitchik explains that Yitzchak, from the time of the akeidah, was considered kodesh kodashim, holy of holies, and not available to marry. He needed to shed that status through his good works before he could have children. Radak, Rashbam, and others refer to the delay as proof of God's mercies, that He granted Yitzchak's prayers to relieve Rivkah of her barrenness. He desires the prayers of His holy ones, and so too the prayers of the rest of us.